Originally published October 30, 2008
The Scorpio mysteries are women’s mysteries and those of death and rebirth. As I continue to bring this new Moon into my awareness along with the fixed star Khambalia, connected with the physical and/or metaphorical idea of Shambala, I am immediately taken back to the most intense experience I had a year ago on my trip to Southern France.
The overall journey was one that has been difficult for me to find words for. The nine women who shared it with me, also felt transformed in ways that felt cellular and hard to express. It was a remembrance – we knew we had been there before, together. As we visited the Languedoc region on the trail of the Magdalene, each of us felt “activated” in certain parts of the land and in various sacred places. My most profound experience occurred for me at Queribus, on the border of Aragon.
Queribus: Photo by Holly Alexander
“Quéribus is high and isolated. It stands on top of the highest peak for miles around and is sometimes regarded as the last Cathar stronghold. After the fall of Montségur in 1244, surviving Cathars gathered together in this mountain-top stronghold on the border of Aragon (the present border between the Aude and the Pyrénées-Orientales). In 1255 a French army was dispatched to deal with these remaining Cathars, but they slipped away without a fight, probably to Aragon or Piedmont – both regions where Cathar beliefs were still common, and where the Occitan language was spoken.” –Wikipedia
Thursday, October 4, 2007
Walking up to Queribus: Photo by Holly Alexander
As I begin my ascension to Queribus, I sense that I have walked this path before. Anticipation comes over me and I know I am heading toward a remembrance of something I cannot name. Our group of seven (three are remaining at the bottom of the mountain) are climbing in silence, and the magnificent views of the surrounding valley become familiar and begin to feel like home.
We reach a resting place, and Nancy guides us to form a circle. She is standing directly opposite of me, her body a few feet away from the cliff’s edge. Within seconds of connection and further silence, I am overcome by an immense and palpable sense of grief. I begin to sob uncontrollably, and although I do not understand this, I willingly let my tears and body mourn the undeniable sadness I feel as I look into her eyes. I feel us dieing. I feel us willingly jumping off the cliff. Thelma and Louise driving their car off the edge of the known world, into the void of nothingness, into the space of absolute surrender and freedom, choosing “death” over a life of subjugation to the advancing patriarchy.
Looking down from Queribus: Photo by Holly Alexander
My tears subside and Nancy tells us this is the place where she and Nicole remembered running through the tunnels, carrying the light codes, attempting to make their way back to the castle, as the invading troops advanced. They are trying to preserve the codes, save themselves and their knowledge. The truth of what they know and why they are here. The walls of the tunnels cave in, they are trapped, death follows.
We continue our climb and begin to explore the castle remains. I am now filled with peace and my sense of home is growing stronger. I recognize
Photo by Holly Alexander
in my bones, in my body, that I have been here, many times before. I sense myself as King, as Queen, as partner to King and Queen, and as a member of a community of those who live in complete harmony. I know my Beloved is here and I can rest in this place. No longing, no desire for anything else. The fire of contentment, here, in this place, is mine.
After a time of exploration, we gather and circle again, this time at the highest level of the castle. We are so high, I feel I can easily stretch my arms up and touch the sky. Quiet fills the air once more as we connect
Photo by Holly Alexander
with this sacred place. Moments pass and I now burst into unbounded laughter. “I do not die,” the words of freedom repeat themselves in my being, and I feel the exquisite joy of release. I sense us grounding into the earth, a pillar of light, (forgetting there is literally a pillar directly below us in the chapel) and I feel we have been here before, doing this together, many times. We have performed this sacred work in another space and time. We have come from another place, a distant star, to do the work, the joyful work, of the Beloved.
Holly at Queribus: Photo by Cayelin Castell
© Holly Alexander at http://www.yourdivineblueprint, 2010. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Holly Alexander and http://www.yourdivineblueprint.com with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
